I could not wear any other shirt today but my one that has africa on it. i could not pray for anything but my kid at school and my African babies. I cannot think about anything but Africa. Again.
And I just slammed the door shut for me to go back there this week. Sometimes we have to give up the things we want the most to find God's heart. Sometimes we have to give up what may be our biggest desire to do what God wants.
My heart burns for Africa. For the people, for the children. Oh Jesus, I want to go back, I can't read about Africa anymore without crying. I just watched a video someone made about Iris in Pemba, and I just cried and cried. Africa is wrecking me, still.
I can't wait to go back. I know I will. I am writing that, because, actually, I have a fear that I will never go back and my 2,700 meticais will just sit on my bookshelf, aging, and never get used. I fear not returning to the children. Because I just shut the door on myself to go back.
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ReplyDeletehi,
ReplyDeleteso i commented but then wanted to add more. i did not know your blog was called a journey to God's heart, but i was thinking about starting a blog titled 'a journey of the heart', to include what God did in Africa and is continuing to do.. anyways, i have yet to begin that one. tell me more about this..decided not to go back to Pemba yet?
<3 ashley